These things happen to me...

[akujunkan]

...so that they don't have to happen to you. (Or, reason 1,832 Why I Must Quit This Shitheap Apartment).

A typhoon blew through yesterday. This being the (statisically proven) least natural disaster-prone prefecture in all of Japan, the typhoon meant lots of heavy winds and little else. It didn't even rain.

It's 12:30 in the morning, and I'm in my bathroom preparing for bed when the roof blows away. Now, this sort of thing is scary enough to make you shit yourself, but ironically I happened to be taking care of that at the time, so disaster was thankfully averted.

So yes, there's a trapdoor in my bathroom ceiling that leads to the roof. You can open it from the roof, but there's no way to secure it from inside the fucking apartment. Masters of architectural planning, these Japanese.

Last night I had dreams that I took a flashlight, went up through the trapdoor, and found the rotting corpses of all the people my landlord had killed. I almost wish this was reality - at least then my employers could no longer argue that there are valid reasons Why I Should Not Live Here.

That will be all.

Comments

[metal-dog5.livejournal.com]

You have to check under your kotatsu, that'll be where they're hiding. (They've been there for a while; going through your mail and blocking up the toilet. Ninjas are sneaky like that.)

[akujunkan.livejournal.com]

Only thing there's room for under my kotatsu is my lower extremites. So no dice there. And I thought the person going through my mail and blocking up the toilet was the landlord. Don't be telling me he's a ninja now...